Oohs and Aahs for 9.20.24
Just doing what works...
After a summer of intense parenting, the first day back to school was a huge relief to me. I wanted to help my son celebrate his new beginning, and somehow honor my own accomplishment of surviving the summer, but the truth is that I felt like hiding in a hole, the darker the better. I summoned some good cheer and got the first-day pictures taken and gave my son lots of pep talks. I knew once he got to school, the teachers would help him have a good day. But how could I help myself have a good day?
Honestly that felt like too much to ask. Maybe it wasn’t even the right question.
Part of me wanted time to process and reflect. The other part of me was overwhelmed at the mere idea of trying to sort through all the stress and come through to the other side. Writing felt far away. Client work felt a little daunting. Even self care felt like a push.
I decided my mantra for the transition was:
Do what I know works until it works.
For me that means…
Taking walks
Checking in with friends
Getting on a little schedule
Reading picture books
Getting a haircut
Tidying up
Charging the electronics
Wandering around a store I like
Making art
These are all things I know I like and will eventually lead to inspiration. They just sounded kind of meaningless and unappealing when I was sorting through my complicated feelings about the summer.
That’s ok.
I still needed something to keep my body and my brain active while the sorting happened. So I did what I know works, without putting pressure on myself to enjoy anything or “get down to business.” That was almost a month ago. I feel more like myself now. I did what I know works until it actually did work and I started to feel better.
Here’s why I’m sharing this with you.
When you’re feeling stuck in your writing, it can be easy to feel like you need to read another craft book, get more disciplined about your word count, or start a whole new project all together. But here’s what you’re forgetting:
You probably already know what works for you.
You might wonder if the work you’re doing will lead anywhere. You might wish the process would go more quickly. You might feel like writing is meaningless or unappealing.
That’s ok.
Just keep writing.
Think back on the moments that felt energizing and full of promise.
Read and take notes.
Wander in a museum.
Watch a funny show.
Get your hair done.
Talk to writer friends.
Go for walks.
Let your mind wander.
Ask yourself “What if?”
Write as though you might know the answer.
Surprise yourself!
Do what you know works until it works.
This isn’t about grinding it out until you make progress, it’s about trusting the process. It might feel like you’re going through the motions, and that’s ok. The difference between the people who write a book and those who don’t is that the people who write a book keep going through the motions. They do what they know works until it works.
Sometimes it’s easier to keep going when you’re with a friend.
That’s why I’m excited to be teaching my first live class in years. Next month I’ll be teaching Finding Your Star: How to Write a Picture Book for Children online for Porch TN. We’ll be reading, writing, and dreaming together! I’ve been pulling books to talk about and I am GEEKED about our reading list. (No need to buy anything. Just get ready for storytime.) Some of the books on the list include:
Ralph Tells a Story by Abby Hanlon
Orion and the Dark by Emma Yarlett
The Blue House by Phoebe Wahl
Stickler Loves the World by Lane Smith
Wild by Emily Hughes
Boxitects by Kim Smith
A Normal Pig by K-Fai Steele
Herman and Rosie by Gus Gordon
Want to schedule some time to do what you know works? Let’s read, dream, and write together! I would love to have you in class. We start October 1st.
This Week I’m…
Sharing this guide to children’s bookstores in Massachusetts after realizing it’s still one of the most popular posts on my website 🤷♀️
Reading this beautiful post about finding space for your art within🎨
Watching this musical genius on repeat with my son ⚙️
Going back through the archives of
’s generous guide to pitching publications—so much good info here!✏️Wondering if we should all just put JD on speed dial? 😂
Wishing I still lived in Southern California so I could wander through the Museum of Make Believe✨
Reminding you there’s still time to sign up for the Mental Health and Motherhood Conference🤰(I’m proud to be moderating this event. Chanel’s responding to the surgeon general’s warning. Let’s do something too.)
Also this was a fun little recap of what I read on Substack this summer!
Highlights
☕ I read the most in the afternoon
💌 I subscribed to 15 new Substacks
📽️ I watched 51 minutes of video
❤️ I liked 68 posts
💬 I left 38 comments on posts
🕵️ I discovered 16 new posts via Notes
Top Substacks
On Things by
A miscellany of things we do, feel and encounter in creative and everyday life.
Top post this summer: What if we already have the things we’re looking for?
Substack Writers at Work membership by
The only all-in-one Substack growth membership where you get expert guidance to build your platform and earn the income you deserve 🔸 A top-5, bestselling featured Substack
Top post this summer: How to Make Money on Substack. Period.
Big Salad by
Life advice, fun finds, and dating gossip — from Joanna Goddard and the Cup of Jo team.
Top post this summer: What It Felt Like to Have Sex for the First Time Post-Divorce
You can see your own summer recap in the Substack app. I’d love to see what you’ve been reading.
If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to your writing friends. And if you’re a writer here on Substack, consider recommending Nebula Notebook, so your readers can join this warm community too.
PS—The fastest way to grow as a writer is to book a manuscript critique or a creative coaching session with an expert.
My clients get agents, sell books, and win awards. They also learn how to find ease and joy in the creative process, so they can keep going when life gets hard.
Oh wow, Heidi, I really needed this. I felt exactly like you described after the first day of school. And I've been struggling to feel good about not knowing how to move forward. Plus, would love to share our difficult summers at some point, cause wow. Basically, thank you for making me feel seen and for providing some actual practical steps for moving forwards. Love ya.
Heidi, this is so kind of you to include me -- you are always so generous with your knowledge, too. I'm so grateful we're connected to each other!