Krista Steele: Paying Attention and Writing It Down

What do you do when you feel burnt out or filled with doubt? 

Whine about it and self-soothe with Trader Joe’s dark chocolate peanut butter cups until I get so tired of my own whining that I shake myself out of it with some Taylor Swift and a pep talk. Almost always this all happens in my mind and when my husband asks me how my day was I say “uhhh good? Yeah. Good. Great. Everything’s good” as the omniscient narrator says “Everything was not great.” 

Did you think of yourself as a creative kid? What does creativity look like for you these days? 

I was absolutely a creative kid. I have a sister who is 6 years younger than me and a brother who is 7 years younger than me so my early childhood was spent as an only child and then when my siblings were born, I became more independent by necessity. We lived in the country and I’d fill a bag with colorful pens, a notebook and a novel and sneak away to a hidden corner of our property. Or I’d write stories at recess or help my dad in the kitchen

Creativity is all around me still. I love to open the pantry and refrigerator, get an idea of what’s on hand and create something nourishing and delicious. When I’m on a long phone call I still doodle in a notebook. I try to pay attention to my life and write it down, to follow the thread that connects what’s personal to me to what’s universally true. The most surprising place I practice creativity is in my work as a psychotherapist. Graduate school taught me the science of my job, but the practice of sitting with clients has taught me the art of listening, of reflecting back someone’s experience. Knowing when to speak and when to sit in silence, when to press gently on a tender place in someone’s story and when to give it more space and time. I think that good therapy is a creative practice, something you engage in as an act of love and hope. 

When do you feel the most creative? 

The more I create, the more creative I feel. Every time I choose to engage with creativity—in my practice, in my kitchen or in my journal—it multiplies. Practically, I feel the most creative when I’m not on social media, when I’m reading books and listening to music and watching compelling movies and television. I feel the most creative when I am paying attention to my life. 

What’s inspiring you outside of your own genre?

I went to the Eras Tour with my sisters in law and oh my gosh it was an inspiration at every turn. The outfits people were wearing! The theatrics of the show itself! I grew up listening to Taylor Swift’s music so her eras are also my eras. Her songs were the soundtrack to my own coming of age with all its angst and delight and despair and joy. Watching her perform songs from ten separate and unique albums was an important reminder to me that I don’t have to decide today who I’m going to be for the rest of my life. I don’t have to be the same person tomorrow as I was yesterday. I can reinvent myself. 

How does art enrich your life? How does being a mother enrich your art?

Art points me in the direction of connection. It builds my capacity for empathy and reminds me that we all have more in common than we realize. That the human experience while infinitely varied is also not unique to me. No one else will live my life but they will experience the same emotions that connect us and bring us closer. Being a mother has taught me that creativity has almost nothing to do with what I’m doing and everything to do with how I think about it. Making lunch can be creative if I choose to see it that way. Motherhood slows me down and changes me when I let it. Being with my kids, talking to them, watching them, playing with them, it trains my eyes to see opportunities for play and to find stories waiting to be told.

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Krista is a therapist, writer and homemaker based in Columbus, Ohio where she lives with her husband, Jeff and their children. She never leaves the house without a book and always adds a bouquet of flowers to her Trader Joe’s cart. If Krista had a rule of life it would be Mary Oliver’s words: “Pay attention. Be astonished. Tell about it.” You can subscribe to her Substack and Ohio residents looking for a therapist can schedule an appointment with her.

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Hi! I’m Heidi. Writer. Editor. Mother. I’m interviewing 100 creative mothers, because I believe the more we see other mothers making beauty and meaning in small moments, the more we will be inspired to make our own kind of art, whatever that may look like during this intense season of life. Support the project by sharing with a friend.